Black History Month: The history of Black Love
A series of love, marriage, family and resilience through the month of February
Image from Google.
We talk often of the issues and problems of Black America. We use this month that was first Negro History week by Dr Carter Woodson and later made a month by President Gerald Ford, as a time to reflect and tell the stories that often get lost in societal discussion.
I do not use it as a time to put down but to empower all of us who can benefit from the power of storytelling and of love.
We at Iconic want to show YOU that happiness and love is possible in any way we can, and we can do that this month to with honoring Black History at the same time.
It is not to say that any form of marriage is lesser than, this is just to highlight those men and women who have made it work and continue to do so.
I know Black Love because I have it and I came from it. And to those who say that adding “Black” is unnecessary I say this:
IF we can be Black when it is about criminality like Black-on-Black crime, we can be Black when we are doing something great in love, marriage, career, and in life.
Pro-blackness is not anti-anyone else. It is a people who went through so much now standing ten toes down being grateful for who we are, how God created us and that nothing can stop us from winning.
If you come here with hate in your heart, you are in the wrong place. Iconic is a place for love.
Blackness is not just our skin color; it is our culture. A culture often expressed through the bad people and not those of us who do well on a daily basis.
We often are reminded of our problems not our successes.
For example, my parents have been married 40 years. Their love created 6 children and spans 5 more marriages and 12 grandchildren.
(My father and mother at their reception after getting married in 1982.).
That is what I know. And that is just my upbringing. My extended family is even more, with other cultures included!
Iconic, for example is birthed out of the love I have for my husband who happens to be a Black man.
A software developer for the United States Air Force, a two-time combat veteran paratrooper who jumped with the 82nd Airborne Division with 2 degrees under his belt. A yellow-black ninjitsu belt too.
(Yes, I brag on my baby a bit). I wear my “Mrs.” title with pride and as gratefulness as it is to have someone to love that loves me.
Black Love is something that pushes back on the erroneous narrative that Black people cannot love each other, or we have to link up with other races or outside the country to be happy.
And that is not true!
That is not to say that others who find love that way are problems. Not to me anyway.
I do not hold my marriage above others. I use it as an example for many that romantic and familial love is a blessing.
But yes, contrary to the naysayers, writers and the people that might be upset: Black Americans can love each other, have peace, and enjoy being together for the long-haul.
There is a narrative out there that Black love is some sort of white supremacy and that the way we love now was pushed onto us by white slavers.
Yes, everything and anything positive somehow is because of what White America does or does not do for us or to us.
I hope you read the sarcasm there.
I push back because some of the earliest Christain Churches exist in Ethiopia. Church Unearthed in Ethiopia Rewrites the History of Christianity in Africa | History| Smithsonian Magazine
Monogamy is not unique to European or Western culture.
This idea that Black descendants of slaves and our American conservative traditionalism was forced upon us is nonsense when slaves use to have their own weddings and ceremonies too.
“Though their unions were not legally recognized, slaves commonly married, fully aware that their marital bonds would be sustained or nullified according to the whims of white masters” Bound in Wedlock: Slave and Free Black Marriage in the Nineteenth Century | Department of History (princeton.edu)
People really have to read a diverse set of books and not from just one side of the ideological aisle that wraps everything about our people around what past white people did or did not do.
There is more to us and our history than that perspective.
And as our people came up from Slavery, as they began to build; love, marriage, family were all important cultural aspects that stick with us today.
Our culture is not just criminality, single-parent homes and any other thing that would seem bad that is not connect to other people groups.
That is just sad and wrong.
(My late cousin Rickey (we lost him to covid and cancer) and his wife Sheila)
The left-wing entertainment, academic and social nature of the conversation leaves out the conservative roots and history that molded our people for decades.
The right-wing media would love us to ignore race as if Black conservatives like Dr Carter Woodson was not notable as the father of Black History.
As if right leaning ideology is not part of our history too.
And still, many Black Americans identify with that conservative nature despite what you think about voting habits. Pew Research Poll: Majority of Black Voters Identify as ‘Moderate’ or ‘Conservative’ – RedState
Black love is unique in that it had to survive so much that went to tear it apart. From the rapping of our women to the bad maternal healthcare, to the Marxism and socialism ideology that fights against the family; it is still here.
Check out six seasons of the television show that gives you more information on this topic than I do here Black Love (TV Series 2017–2022) - IMDb
And with my energy, I will show you that type of love so that it inspires you. So that you know that love can conquer all.
Here is more for you to quickly look at from Essence Magazine on The History of Black Love Through The Years - Essence
“Black folks had small “wedding” ceremonies, including the ritual of waving a broom over the couple’s head or jumping the broom, a custom believed to have been brought from West Africa.”
Like every relationship, there are ups and downs. And yet many survived.
We are here to celebrate love, teach and educate you on why that matters in today’s climate and how YOU can benefit from the marriage of your dreams.
We uplift. We inspire. We do things to honor our past, present and future.
We create legacies, we build and above all else we thank our creator God for such a chance to know Love and to experience it, give it and manifest it into who we are.
Throughout the month of February, I will be posting history of love through the Black American lens.
That could be the brave men and women at war for love of country, the couples during Reconstruction and building Black Wall Street, the musicians that wrote ballads of love songs we all dance our feet to today.
Black History is not about making white America feel bad or the white guilt nonsense some may use it for.
It is about educating. In fact, Dr Carter Woodson chose the original week in February to honor Lincoln and Douglass’ birthdays to show how two different men from two different cultures worked together. ‘Negro History Week’ in Chicago: Carter G. Woodson’s idea sparks meetings, op-ed by Chandler Owen - Chicago Sun-Times (suntimes.com)
Valentine’s Day also falls on February 14th and as a content creator empowering you to have the better marriage of your dreams, what better way to fill the air with love than to combine the two ideas: Black History and love.
For history is not just a sad tale of events that happened but also weaved through it is a story about love, family, redemption, overcoming, resilience and winning.
May you use these stories to inspire your own love and remember that you too can have the great passion that exists out here.
And remember in all things you do, be Iconic.
Iconic is a new newsletter to empower men and women to have successful marriages that thrive for a meaningful legacy.
The marriage stats are not good in the United States and around the world.
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