Breaking Fear and Revitalizing Marriage: The Kingdom Path to Loving-Kindness
Our Iconic Kingdom Marriages eSeries | Applying Loving-Kindness in a World that Needs it 1 John 4: 11
Good afternoon, Iconic audience family,
We are back with a new season of Resurrection. It is our Easter Season, and we are celebrating the life, death, and resurrection of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ with a new fundraiser and theme.
This year’s theme is Breaking Fear pulled from the scripture in 2 Timothy 1: 7 “God has not given us the spirit of fear, but he has given us power, love and sound mind (self-control). With this theme, our new Easter Fundraiser is here where we are raising $2500 for this Holy Month to give away 100 copies of our book Breaking Fear to local GA churches and orgs to empower them.
When you donate, proceeds also go toward my Conscious Conservative Movements Speaker Training where I will learn to take the powerful Iconic Marriage platform on the road to individuals and couples nationwide. You also support more on my Crohn’s disease healing journey and help us build the Iconic platform.
Donate today and get our Iconic Formula for Marriage Success eBook for donations of $25 or print for $50. For $100, you get the online course of the same name.
Now let’s get into today’s lesson:
Breaking Fear and Revitalizing Marriage: The Kingdom Path to Loving-Kindness
I was browsing around social media yesterday and saw all this infighting. Yes, that’s normal for the internet but a lot of the accounts were so-called Christians in their bios or showing their cross emojis.
It bothered me.
As we walk in the light of the Lord, we are called to represent his message, the Kingdom of God, and to represent his righteousness like in Matthew 6:33. Unfortunately, you see so-called Christians wrestle in the mud with the foolishness of the world just the same, arguing with those who freely choose not to live how we do.
I have been guilty of this display, too.
We feel obligated to push back on what we deem wicked and evil but instead we look just as guilty and poorly raised as the people we are up against. Christian couples with multiple divorces, fighting on tv shows, pastors with scandals of disrespecting their wives and families, no different from the secular world.
And Christianity is falling globally.
It doesn’t bode well on us or God’s call on our lives as ambassadors of his Kingdom. The worse part, it is all out of fear. We fear, that if we don’t fight fire with fire, the world we live in will fall forgetting that this world will pass away. It isn’t that we aren’t to call out evil and to preach the gospel that sometimes offend folks, it is how we go about doing it and leaving people alone if they freely choose to reject the Lord.
In fact, we would do better if we modeled a Christian Walk instead of always hoping on podcast mics to preach at people. Like children, people see more of what we do, not what we say. We as children of God can and should be doing better.
“Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other.”1 John 4:11 (NLT)
Fear of having haters or enemies is a powerful, yet often unspoken, force in many lives—including the lives of Kingdom couples. It can drive decisions, influence actions, and lead us astray from God’s calling for marriage as a sacred union. Jesus challenges us to rise above fear and exemplify a radical love: “But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44, ESV). In Kingdom marriages, this call to love is amplified—not just within the relationship but outward to the world.
Overcoming Fear and Living Love
Fear of criticism or opposition can creep into marriages in various ways:
Protectiveness Against Outside Judgment: Couples might isolate themselves or avoid authenticity to prevent scrutiny.
Fear of Vulnerability: A spouse may resist opening up about weaknesses, worrying it could be used against them.
Fear of Failure: The pressure to “live perfectly” as a Kingdom couple might lead to avoiding risks or challenges.
Yet fear itself is not from God. As 2 Timothy 1:7 reminds us: “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” This is our theme for our Easter Season because we must be reminded that fear is our own doing, not God’s. Importantly, Kingdom couples are equipped to rise above fear and demonstrate loving-kindness—even toward their critics and enemies. By doing so, they honor God and model Christ’s love.
Why Society Relishes Drama Over Wholesome Love
In a culture saturated with entertainment, drama often overshadows real-life examples of healthy relationships. Shows featuring toxic marriages, betrayals, and selfishness garner attention because:
Conflict sells: Drama draws viewers, feeding on curiosity and emotional reactions.
Society mirrors brokenness: Many identify with flawed depictions of relationships because they reflect personal experiences of dysfunction.
Neglect of Godly principles: Entertainment rarely celebrates forgiveness, humility, or servanthood—principles that are foundational to Kingdom marriages.
Instead of craving guidance for building love and trust, many gravitate to narratives that confirm their fears and insecurities about relationships.
Kingdom Marriages: Revitalizing the Institution
Kingdom couples are uniquely positioned to counter cultural narratives and restore the beauty of marriage. Here’s how they can lead by example:
Modeling Loving-Kindness:
Practical Example: A husband and wife, facing harsh criticism for their beliefs, respond with grace and prayers for their critics. Their humility demonstrates Christ’s call to love enemies.
Scripture: “Do not repay evil for evil… but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called” (1 Peter 3:9, ESV).
Demonstrating Unity Through Faith:
Practical Example: A couple openly shares how God helped them overcome struggles, showing that authenticity and faith are pathways to deeper connection.
Scripture: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor” (Ecclesiastes 4:9).
Redefining Marriage in Media:
Practical Example: Kingdom couples can create or support wholesome content that reflects biblical love, countering harmful media portrayals.
Scripture: “Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just… think about these things” (Philippians 4:8).
Investing in Community:
Practical Example: They mentor younger couples, teaching them the values of respect, forgiveness, and servant-hearted love.
Scripture: “Older women likewise… are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children” (Titus 2:3-4).
Final Thoughts
Fear of having haters or enemies can hinder couples from embracing the fullness of God’s calling for their marriages. But Kingdom couples who exemplify loving-kindness, reject drama-filled cultural norms, and prioritize faith can revitalize marriage as a God-honoring institution. They remind the world that love is not just an emotion—it is a choice, a commitment, and a reflection of Christ’s ultimate sacrifice.
Let Kingdom couples rise to this challenge, reshaping society’s view of marriage and inspiring generations to come. Together, they can ignite a movement of radical love, healing, and purpose—transforming not just their homes but the world around them.
Loving Our Enemies
Loving our enemies as Kingdom married couples means embodying Christ’s teachings of grace, forgiveness, and humility—not only within the marriage but also toward those who oppose or challenge us. Here’s how this can look in practice:
1. Responding with Grace
Example: A Kingdom couple may face criticism for their faith-based lifestyle. Instead of retaliating with anger, they choose to respond calmly and graciously, demonstrating Christ’s love through their actions.
Scripture: “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them” (Romans 12:14, ESV).
2. Praying for Critics
Example: When a colleague or family member acts against them, they come together as a couple to pray for that person, asking God to heal any brokenness or pain causing their behavior.
Scripture: “But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44, ESV).
3. Setting Boundaries Without Bitterness
Example: A couple might have to establish boundaries with someone who brings negativity or harm into their lives, but they do so lovingly, without harboring resentment.
Scripture: “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice” (Ephesians 4:31, ESV).
4. Modeling Forgiveness
Example: If someone wrongs them—be it a friend, a neighbor, or even a church member—they openly forgive and move forward in love, refusing to let bitterness take root.
Scripture: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32, ESV).
5. Serving Together as a Witness
Example: A couple may choose to serve those who’ve wronged them, such as offering help to an estranged family member in need, showing the power of God’s unconditional love.
Scripture: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink” (Romans 12:20, ESV).
Transforming Fear into Love
Kingdom couples who love their enemies reflect the heart of Christ to the world. This approach isn’t about ignoring wrongs but about trusting God to handle justice while we walk in obedience to love. This not only strengthens the marriage but also serves as a powerful testimony of faith.
Would you like to explore more actionable ways to embrace this Kingdom principle? Leave us a comment and tell us if this eSeries has been a blessing to you.
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